change the way you spend

here's the last post, as promised...  sorry it's so late!

i'm devoting my birthday week to big changes that we've made in our lives over the last 2 years- particularly the last year.  i've already talked about changing the way we eat and use... now i'm here to talk about the money, money, money...

money has been a very big challenge for us over the last 2 years.  it's definitely been the single-biggest source of tension in our home.  when we were married we each had debt- we each had our own student loans, dave had his car and we each had credit card debt- his had our honeymoon on it, and mine just had irresponsibility on it...  $27k in total debt.  boo.  we immediately got to work.  we had a house, and i had just gotten a new job- we were rolling right along.  1 year later we were down to $21k.  then the next spring things started falling apart.  i've probably told this 1000x, but here goes again- dave was laid off in january 2009.  he had made it through 3 previous lay offs, but this time not many people escaped.  luckily, he still had a month left to work, and a month left of pay after that.  during this time a job opened up at his company at the office he worked at when he first started w\ ge (outside of chicago).  he interviewed for the job, and was offered.  he had 45 days to report up there, and they would not assist w\ relo.  so we had 45 days to pack, move and figure out what to do w\ a house that we had not even owned for 2 years.  i ended up staying by myself for 6 weeks in atlanta packing our house (our neighborhood had recently been hit by a string of robberies too- comforting).  our rental prospect fell through and w\ foreclosures in the neighborhood, we were forced to short sale or else we'd be joining them.  making a long story short- we sold our house for almost $90k less than what we owed- luckily that was all forgiven.  blah blah.

so we moved up here and i found out i was pregnant a week later.  too bad no one wants to hire a pregnant woman.  i got a job at target, and worked there through the delivery.  during this time, we managed to pay off dave's car.  now we manage to live w\ my minimal income from the 2 jobs i have (i stay home w\ ian) and what my husband has.  with the ge insurance debacle from having ian and our previous er trip- we've accrued extra debt.  so we are working on paying that off...  it's hard.  most months i feel like we just have enough money to pay our bills and pay nothing extra, but we press on!

we started listening to dave ramsey while we were still in atlanta and we are currently at work on our debt snowball.  paying off the smaller debts up to the largest.  we currently pay just the minimum on both of our loans while we work on the hospital bill and our insurance.  once the hospital bill gets paid off (barring anything else happening) we start paying on dave's loan harder- then mine!  i'd like to get all this paid off before we think of buying a home again. 

here's the only advice i can offer on what works for us-

1.  don't use credit cards if at possible.  i wish this was fully true for us.  i have 2 store cards that i use for points purposes that are paid immediately upon use.  we also have a regular credit card that we use for big purchases (airline tickets).  our goal is to not have to use this card at all.

2.  make a budget.  we have been using the same excel file for almost 4 years that we add a new page to monthly.  it has a list of all our bills, how much is due, when it's due, how much remains, etc.  it helps to see the numbers in front of you.  instead of blindly paying every month, i can see that when i pay, the number gets smaller- and that still inspires me after 4 years.

3.  sell or donate what you don't need.  make money where you least expect it!  we are in the process of weeding through junk in our house.  we have been selling things on ebay and have made about $300 in the last 2 months.  what we don't sell, we'll donate.  whether it's having money in our pocket right now, or using the donation to write off on our taxes- it's putting money in our pocket either way!

4.  take advantage of referral programs.  some companies will offer you money if you refer people to them- we are with dish, and they offer up to $500 a year.  just through referrals so far, dave & i will be getting $45 off our bill.  that's our entire bill.

5.  less spending on junk.  this is a work in progress.  just learning not to buy stuff we don't need and saving for what we do need.  i started making a list of wants and needs.  seeing the list helps me know that we have to earn it.

6.  couponing.  i could write an entire post on this, but i won't bore you.  we shop @ supertarget b\c i get a 10% discount + 5% redcard discount.  coupons + making my list in advance = usually saving at least $50 per bill!  btw, coupons aren't just for junk food!

7.  cheap dates-  being broke may mean that you can't go on vacation, but it doesn't mean you can't have date night.  we try to do our dates via coupons/deals from groupon, scoubmob, or living social.  that gives us food or movie tickets for half price!  woot!

and those are just a few (whew!) of the ways we try to make our money work.  i'm always looking for more ideas, so bring them on!

fml or how i reached my insurance deductible by february for the second year in a row

boo.

if you have been reading this blog since i was pregnant, then you know about our insurance ordeal(s).  if not, let me (quickly) explain.

in september 2009, my happiness in having my first baby was turned to fear when i learned that my husband's company (which i hate with every fiber of my being) was "revamping" their insurance plans.  this meant that on january 1, 2010, we would be covered by a new plan, with a new, much higher deductible.  our deductible which was once $300, would now be $2,000, $3,000 or $4,000 (and after that only 80% of costs would be paid until you hit your max- which is double your deductible).  the only things that would be paid would be "preventative care."  so in essence, they want their employees to be healthier, go to their dr's for preventative appointments in order to avoid other appts and to cut down on unnecessary er visits when you could wait to see your dr. in the morning.  what they failed to realize is that emergencies happen, and that PEOPLE HAVE BABIES.  this company did not care that i would only be pregnant 3 weeks (not even) of 2010.  my condition was not "pre-existing."  in other words, i, a perfectly healthy woman was being punished for having a baby.  we tried to deliver early, ian's lungs weren't healthy enough, we had to wait, we got slapped with $4000+ worth of bills and we are STILL paying for the birth of my son 13 months after his birth.

dave & i will probably not have another baby while he is working for this company.  sad, isn't it.

so, january 20, 2011- my son's 1st birthday.  we go to play group and have a good time.  monday, january 24, ian starts coughing.  i learn from another mother that her son was diagnosed w\ rsv over the weekend.  rsv takes 4-6 days to show up- explaining why this baby wasn't sick until the weekend and why ian wasn't sick until monday.  at this time ian also appears to have all 4 of his top front teeth coming in.  yay.  we're also on the brink of a wonder week.  joy.

saturday, january 29th ian throws up after nursing from coughing so much- it's the 2nd time it's happened that week.  we are able to get him in to see the pediatrician, who almost writes us off after we explain ian's "symptoms" until i finally get ian to drink water from his sippy- which causes him to cough.  the dr. doesn't say one way or another whether ian has rsv, but his cough is consistent, he has a runny nose and he has lost 5 oz.  we go home irritated.

wednesday, february 2nd.  dave & i are watching a movie when all the sudden ian wakes up screaming in terror- we usually give him a few minutes- and we did, but the screaming doesn't subside.  i go in and pick him up, but he's still screaming, i rock him, i walk with him, we turn the light on in the room- still screaming.  i take him into our room, lay him on  our bed, try to sit him on the floor to crawl, give him to dave- he was still inconsolable.  i sent my friend a text b\c i was so worried, and she called me back- the screaming was terrible- her husband could hear him.  i talked to her for a few minutes, and then called my mil.  we finally decided to page the pediatrician's office- the pediatrician was SO RUDE (there are 8 dr's at our practice and thank God this wasn't my dr.).  he told us that we should take ian to the er because "he couldn't help me over the phone" (ass).  this was our worst fear- do we wait and see if he gets better & risk something bad happening b\c we are afraid to take him to the er b\c of the cost or do we take him and know that we're going to get slapped with a bill that could range up to $6000 (i call this fear-mongering, husband's company calls this "insurance.")

so we bundle our screaming kid in his snowsuit (please remember we had a BLIZZARD that had just ended 8 hours before this) and drive as slooowly as possible on the awful roads to a hospital i'm not familiar with (the hospital i delivered at was just too far to go to).  it's almost midnight.  ian is calm for the car ride.  we get him checked in, they take his temp (no temp), weigh him (he's now lost 8 oz) and ask us some questions, then we go into our er room.  the nurse comes in and asks questions, we tell him about the possible rsv, the blood that's been in the diaper for 3 months, etc.  ian goes back & forth the entire night between screaming in terror/tiredness/anger/confusion and laughing or being calm.  he wants nothing to do with me, and only sleeps in small spurts when dave is holding him.

tests performed at hospital:  catheter for urinalysis, rsv test, breathing treatment, chest x-rays, iv and blood draws (had to leave the room for that one), ultrasound, and abdominal x-rays.  everything comes back negative except for "inflammation" in the blood work, which gets us admittance to the regular hospital (around 6 am).  ian is asleep on dave, so i drive home, grab snacks, extra clothes/diapers and fight morning traffic back to the hospital.  we're in our room (which they don't have a crib for) and waiting on the ped.  we finally see the ped who goes over all the inconclusive tests- and says that maybe ian just had gas (i will refrain from punching anyone in the face at this time).  we're told to monitor is intake & outtake for a few hours, and they'll let us know when we can leave.  finally after sitting in a hospital room all effing day doing nothing- we get discharged around 2:30 (and ian is asleep).  so we wait until he wakes up, we get his iv out, and we go.  we have no answers, and now we have no money.  awesome.  we also got to visit the pediatrician again on friday the 11th for blisters in the diaper area- we got the honor of seeing the dr. for a full 3 minutes for him to tell me to keep doing what i'm doing for it, and that maybe the concentration of his urine is what caused the blisters.  grrrrrrrrrrrr.

so thank you to everyone who asked about ian during these last 3 weeks.  i wish i could say i knew what was going on with him that night- or during these last 3 weeks.  he's currently doing really well- happy and smiling and laughing- he's being himself.  me- i'm recovering.  i was pretty depressed during that time- it was worse than anytime after i had given birth to him.  it was hard.  we're glad to all be back to normal.  now, to win the lottery and pay off those medical bills!

a couple photos to remember this by...

ian in the hospital crib- which looks like a cage.  and finally asleep after being discharged.